Ty part like, a million.

So I’m rereading the bullshit from 4 years ago and honestly as an (almost) 29 year old reading it I want to smack the writer and Ty. Like, props to you “narrator” for being objective, sassy and cool, but OH MY GOD JUST FUCKING ADMIT YOU LOVE TY. And Ty…wtf. Your reason for not wanting to date her is absurd. “Oh we’re great together but who knows about the romantic compatibility?” Everyone does, dumbass. Everyone does. And the outlook is fucking magnificent.

So this is my advice to you two self-obsessed nerds.

Dear Ty & Chelsea,

You are clearly compatible. Despite your best wishes every fucking hangout will be laced with palpable sexual tension that will make every smile and every joke feel heavy in a good way. Your reasons for not being together are weak. You should give it a try. Chelsea- I know you reached out to Ty and asked him about this after the wedding with John that made you want to scream and Ty rejected your advances on some BULLSHIT again. Reach out again.

Hey Ty- you’re being a fuckhead. You’re fucked up, that’s for sure. But we’ve all had bad relationships. We’ve all had our hearts broken. Suck it up, sweetheart. Chelsea is literally the most magical fucking person you will ever be blessed by. REREAD WHAT YOU FUCKING WROTE. You’re older and wiser now. Read between the lines you fucking jackass. You two should give it a try. Here’s what I won’t say- I won’t say it’s meant to be. I won’t say it’s fate. BUT. You two have remained in each other’s lives for no real reason. It feels a little fate-y. Please kindly remove your heads from your asses and deal with this shit.

Forever yours,




I know it’s weird that I’m writing this. I’m Chelsea. Duh. But also like I really expected to have a coming to jesus moment reading it. And I did. But it didn’t help me get over anything. It just made me way more aware of the fact that this is dumb and we should give this a try.

  1. The girl you mention in the previous “Ty” series that he’s kind of in love with? You hook up at her WEDDING. And it’s pretty decent. Perspective, fuckers.



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